What if?
by scandinavian beauty
Summary: Update! New chapter added and rating changed! What if...Raoul never made it down to the lair after the ‘Don Juan Triumphant’ performance. Piangi wasn’t killed, merely knocked out and tied up and the Mob never went looking for the Phantom.
1. Chapter 1

_**SUMMARY:**_

_**What if... Raoul never made it down to the lair after the 'Don Juan Triumphant' performance. Piangi wasn't killed, merely knocked out and tied up. The Mob never went looking for the Phantom.**_

_Disclamer: I don't own 'Phantom of the Opera' or any of its characters. I'm merely borrowing them for a while._

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**Chapter 1:**

'Have you gorged yourself at last in your lust for blood? Am I now to be prey to your lust for flesh?'

Christine boldy asked the Phantom looking stright into his eyes. He looked at her coldly and answered.

'That fate, which condemns me to wallow in blood has also denied me the joys of the flesh. This face- the infection which poisons our love...'

He slowly approached her.

'This face, which earned a mother's fear and loathing. A mask, my first unfeeling scrap of clothing.'

The Phantom roughly grabbed her shoulders and pulled her towards the mirror, forcing her to look into it with him standing behind her. The contrast between their appearences startled Christine. Her unmarred features and beauty next to his scarred face. She realised she no longer feared him.

'Pity comes too late, turn around and face your fate, an eternity of this before your eyes!'

Turning around and looking him straight in the eyes Christine coldly stated.

'This haunted face holds no more horror for me now. It's in your soul that the true distortion lies.'

Upon hearing her words the Phantom felt as if all the air was sucked out of his lungs.

She hated and dispised him, just like every one else did. He could not care less about what the rest of the world thought of him, but for Christine to hate him so. It was more than he could bear. She was the one person whose opinion mattered to him and to have her looking at her like that was devestating.

His plan had been to force her to marry him, but now he realised he could not do that to her. He could not condemn her to a life of darkness and hatred. He staggered away from her and sat down next to his organ and put his head in his hands.

Christine did not understand what had happened with her former tutor. One moment he was like a madman, refusing to listen to reason, and the next he was moving away from her. For the longest time she stood there and looked at him, uncertain as what to do. Her mind screamed at her go try and get away while it was possible, and she started moving towards the boat. Suddenly a sound stopped her, at first she did not understand what if was, but then it hit her like a ton of bricks. It was the sound of crying. She turned around to a sight no one had ever seen before, the feared Phantom of the Opera was sitting with his head in his hands and crying like a lost child.

Slowly Christine approached him and sat down on her knees next to him. When he finally noticed she was sitting next to him, he slowly looked up at her. The pain and sadness in his eyes brought tears into Christines own eyes. _"All the sadness of the world..."_ That was what she had told Raoul and now she truly knew the truth of those words. And this time it was all her doing, her words alone had broken this man's spirit. She put her arms around him like a mother would to soothe a crying child. Finally the sobbing started to subside.

'Christine... I never meant to hurt you. I...I love you.' She could barely hear the whispered confession, but it warmed her heart.

'I know'.

She pressed her lips against the marred side of his face. The Phantom felt as if he couldn't breathe. For the first time in his life did someone else beside himself touch the disfigurement. He knew then he had to let her go. Go back to her own life and he could no longer be a part of it. She had to live her life away from him, without his interference, with that...boy.

'You need to go back. Go back and forget all you ever heard about the Phantom of the Opera.'

Chrstine was surpised when she realised what he had said.

'What do you mean? You are going to let me go? Go back to Raoul? After everything you've done to get me down here tonight?'

'Yes.'

Realising that was the only answer she would get Christine took his head between her hands to force him to look at her. He refused to look her in the eyes.

'Why?'

Finally he looked her in the eyes.

'Because I love you. And... you deserve a life lived in light and happiness, not in fear and darkness.'

He stood up and in doing so the persona of the Phantom seemed to settle on him.

'It is too late to bring you back up tonight. Get some rest.'

Abruptly he turned and started walked away from her.

'Wait! Angel! Wait!' Christine called after him. He stopped but did not turn around.

'I'm no angel Christine. Don't...call me that.'

'Then what should I call you? I can't call you Phantom.'

He was quiet for such a long time that Christine feared he would not answer her.

'I...was once called Erik.'

With those words he left her and disappeared into another room she had not previously noticed.

Confused she slowly made her way towards the room with the swan bed and lay down on it. She didn't think she would be able to sleep, but soon she found her eyelids dropping and she drifted off the sleep.

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_This is my first fanfic, so please be kind and review. Constructive critisism only please, otherwise don't bother!_

_If anyone would like to be my beta reader please let me know as I currently don't have one._

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_UPDATE! To those who reviewed – thank you so much. Since this is my first fanfic attempt I'm so happy to get such positive respons. I've made this chapter a bit longer since I thought it turned out a bit too short_


	2. Chapter 2

NEXT MORNING

Christine slowly became aware of her surroundings. At first she thought she was back in the ballet dormitories, but as consciousness took hold of her she remembered the events of the previous evening. She got out of the bed and walked into the main area of the lair. At first she couldn't see the Phantom, bit after looking around she found his sitting with his back towards her a writing desk. He was not writing however, but going through what from a distance looked like drawings.

'Ang…' No, that was not his name. She tried again calling out to him.

'Erik?'

He stood up to face her and she immediately saw he was once again wearing the white half mask and that his clothes was impeccable as always. The overwhelming Phantom persona was yet again present, but it no longer frightened her.

'I…I…' She could not think of anything to say, but was spared trying to come up with something when Erik spoke.

'I brought you something to eat before I bring you back.' He indicated with a nod to a small package wrapped in linen cloth lying in the organ bench.

'Thank you.' Christine sat down and opened the package. It was simple food, bread and cheese, but looking at it she found she was ravenous and she started eating.

While she ate Erik started preparing the boat and opening the portcullis.

'You are really going to let me go?' Christine still had a hard time believing he had meant what he had told her last night.

'Yes.'

'Will...will I see you again? Will you continue my voice lessons?'

'No.'

When hearing his answer she quickly looked up at him to see if he really meant it. He was standing next to the boat with his back towards her.

'Erik. Please look at me. Why will you not continue to teach me?'

'Because a Vicomtess does not sing in public.' He turned to look at her and the pain in his eyes made her realise what an effort it was to him to say those words.

He held you his hand to her.

'Come. it is time for you to return to the theatre.'

Christine stood up and walked over to Erik and he helped her into the boat. During the voyage across the lake Christine could not help but wondering about what Erik had said. He was taking her back to the theatre, to Raoul and then he would disappear from her life. When hearing his words she had felt relief. It was what she wanted after all, to marry Raoul and be happy. Yet a small voice in the back of her head kept whispering that she did not want Erik to disappear from her life at all and to embrace the feelings he provoked in her during their duet during the performance of 'Don Juan Triumphant'. She had never felt so alive before in her life has she had done singing the music he composed. The same way she felt when he sang to her the first time Erik brought her down to his lair.

The trip across the lake did not take long and soon Erik and Christine were walking along the corridor leading to her dressing room. The closer they came to the room, the more pronounced the smell of smoke became.

When they entered Christine's dressing room through the hidden entrance behind the mirror, Christine gasped in surprise. The door stood open and though it appeared that the fire had not reached this far, damage caused by the smoke had ruined the dressing room. Christine ran out of the room to try and find Madame Giry and Meg. The devastation she saw chocked her. The areas close to the stage were severely damaged by the fire and the stage itself and the auditorium were gutted. Standing in the middle of the stage looking around at the devastation Christine felt numb. She knew Erik had caused the chandelier in the auditorium to crash when he abducted her, but she had no idea of the damage it caused.

'Christine!'

Turning around to find who had called out to her, she saw Meg and Madame Giry standing next to the stage.

'Where have you been? Are you alright? What happened to you? Where's the Phantom? What…' The questions seemed to tumble out of Meg and she did not give Christine a chance to answer before the next one.

'Meg!' Madame Giry's stern voice interrupted Meg's barrage of questions. Madame Giry gave Meg a look that was clearly meant for her to be quiet, the she turned to Christine.

'How are you, Christine? Did he …hurt you?'

Even though Madame Giry did not say it Christine knew she meant if Erik had forced himself on her. After their performance just before the unmasking the question was inevitable.

'No, he did not hurt me, in any way.'

Under Madame Giry's scrutiny Christine found herself blushing, despite that nothing had happened.

'Come, you must be tired. We only came here to collect our belongings when we saw you running through the backstage area. I have managed to temporarily acquire some lodgings for me and Meg. There is room for you too. We shall talk there.'

'Madame Giry, what happened last night after I…disappeared?'

'Many things and this is not the place to talk about them. Come. Let's go and collect your belongings.'

After years of obeying the ballet mistress during long practice hours Meg and Christine did not object and quietly followed her when she turned to leave.

Just before exiting the auditorium Christine turned to take one last look at the now burnt out stage and she could have sworn she saw a shadow in what used to be box 5.

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Later that afternoon Christine, Meg and Madame Giry sat in the drawing room in the small apartments she had rented. It was not very big and Meg and Christine would have to share a room, but since the girls were used to sleeping in ballet dormitories with the other ballerinas it was not a problem. The time had finally come to talk.

'Now, Christine. Tell me what happened after you disappeared.'

'I…I hardly know where to start. It is all so confusing.'

'Take your time, we are in no hurry.'

'He brought me down to his home. There he made me put on a wedding dress.'

'A wedding dress?!' Meg's outburst interrupted Christine. 'Oh my…do you think he…?'

'Meg! Let Christine finish.' Turning to Christine again, she motioned to her to continue her story.

'Yes, a wedding dress. He…he wanted to make me his bride, to live with him there in the darkness. But something stopped him. I do not know what. He broke down and started crying, just … like a lost child.'

'Crying?' Meg could not help herself. 'The Phantom of the Opera crying?! What ever for?'

'Meg! Be quiet!' Madame Giry silenced her daughter with a look. She turned to Christine.

'What did you say to him just before that happened?'

'I said that I was not afraid of him because it was his soul that made him a monster and not his face.' Christine could not look at Madame Giry while she said those words.

'You told him his soul made him a monster.' It was not a question.

'Yes, but then I realised he was just a man. A man, not an Angel of Music nor a opera ghost. Just…Erik.'

'Erik?' Meg was confused. 'Who is Erik?'

'That is his name. He told me that after deciding to bring me back up to the theatre.'

'So, he told you his name. He must truly love you then, it has been a long time since he acknowledged that name.' Madame Giry sounded distant as she was lost in the memories of her and Erik's first meeting.

Meg and Christine could not believe what they just heard. Confused they could not help nut stare at Madame Giry.

'Maman, you know the Phantom?' Madame Giry was quiet for such a long time that they thought she was not going to answer.

'Yes, Meg. I know him, or perhaps I should say knew him. It has been many years since he answered to that name and demanded to be called the Phantom or Opera Ghost.'

Seeing the astonished looks on both the girls faces she told them the same story she had told the Viscomte how she helped a boy escape the gypsies all those years ago.

'You have known Erik all these years? And helped him?' Christine was still in a daze.

'Yes, I knew him. I brought him food and things that would not be missed during those first years. Then I fell in love with Jules and we married. For few years I was away from the Opera house and after Jules's early death I returned with Meg, barely a year old, to become the Ballet Mistress. I tried to find Erik, but after almost being caught in one of his traps I stopped looking. When the whisperers about a ghost began I knew who it was. Then I found him, or he let me find him. One night I could not sleep and I heard music playing. I followed the sound, it led me to the empty stage. He was there, waiting for me. He had changed so much, the boy whom for years had been like a little brother to me, was gone. He truly was the Phantom of the Opera.'

'And that was when you started helping him. Why, maman?'

'He saw my leaving the Opera house as a betrayal to him. And I could not blame him for believing that. I was his only friend during our teenage years, the only one who treated him with kindness. And I abandoned him for another, leaving him all alone. It was my guilty conscience that made me start helping him, bringing messages and such to the managers.'

'But he terrorised all the staff and …'

'Yes, Meg, but mostly the rumours about his actions were exaggerated. Mainly by Bouquet and his cohorts. He did encourage them though as it made the managers more compliant towards his…requests.'

A knock at the door interrupted them. It was the landlady.

'A man is here to see you, Madame Giry.'

'Who is it?'

'A Vicomte Raoul De Chagny.'

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_For those who reviewed and added my story to their alert list: thank you. Your support means so much to me. _

_I was hoping to be able to update twice a month or more, but my job takes more time than I thought so I'm now aiming for one update once a month. If I have time it will be more often, but can't make any promises. _


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